What can I say?

Since my last blog, so much has happened, my day in court finally came and went. It could have been worse. The Garden of Eden is on the market at perhaps the worst time in America's history since the depression. There has never been more homes on sale. The first day I recieved an offer which at the time I thought to be ridiculous, but now I'm not so sure. Homes in my neighborhood do not have landscaping or large yards, few have any curb appeal. I've been told that some are taking any offers as they have other homes in play, or should I say in pay. I just replaced nearly every window in the house and still no new offers. The house did hasn't looked this good. I do not want to pay the exorbitant heating bills of last year. Hopefully something good will happen soon. The summer has been spent working a second shift (on the house)several days a week and frankly I am tired of it, in more ways than one.
Someone I worked with years ago,and indirectly, was asking about my name changes and was suprised to find I was happy....
We must try to hold on to the mantra, Life is short, live like you were dying. Oh, yeah that's a country song. You know what I mean. I've had too much drama and it cannot be healthy. Fall has never been so welcome....

Bad Dream

Years ago Pax and Jax and I would analyze our dreams over coffee breaks. Now I want to see what psychoanalysis you can make out of this one. It really happened.

The other night I dreamt that bees were stinging me all over, so real I felt them on my arms.
They were no ordinary bees as they stuck to you skin and they had to be physically removed. I could not get them off fast enough. Someone came along as I nearly completed removing them and opening their hand and added a few more (no sticking there). I kept saying they are poisoning me and as I woke I could feel the sensations on my arms as if they were really being stung.

OK you psychology majors what do you make of this?

One Word

You can only type one word. It is not as easy as you might think. Copy or
> forward, change the answers to suit you, and pass it on (don't forget me).
> It's hard to only use one-word answers.
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> 1. Where is your cell phone ? table
> 2. Your significant other? secret
> 3. Your hair? blondish
> 4. Your Skin? Fair
> 5. Your mother? Kathleen
> 6. Your favorite thing? gardens
> 7. Your dream last night? none
> 8. Your favorite drink? cosmopolitan
> 9. Your dream/goal? retirement
> 10. The room you're in? office
> 11. Your ex? bubba
> 12. Your fear? debt
> 13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? gardening
> 14. Where were you last night? friends
> 15. What you're not? brave
> 16. Muffins?YES
> 17. One of your wish list items? Peace
> 18. Where you grew up? Ohio
> 19. The last thing you did? ate
> 20. What are you wearing? capri's
> 21. Your TV? off
> 22. Your pet(s)? deceased
> 23. Your computer? here
> 24. Your life? stalled
> 25. Your mood? Depressed
> 26. Missing someone? jax
> 27. Your car? old
> 29. Favorite Store? qvc
> 30. Your summer? peacefull
> 31. Like someone? Yes
32. Your favorite color? green
> 33. When is the last time you laughed? am
> 34. Last time you cried? 6/14/08
> 35. Who will/would re-post this? michelle
> 36. Whose Answers are you anxious to see? Everyone
>
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> Hugs And Kisses
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A visit to Officeland II & BB

Well today was the first of my weekly visits to Officeland II and wouldn't you know Big Daddy was not there. I did run into Gracie who was kind enough to show me around the labyrinth. Everyone spoke so warmly and greeted me, some with hugs. Let's see how long that lasts when I finish my mission. I found myself in a large space but far away from any windows. Not much to look at as the mall across the street is under construction. One perk is that I was sitting near Rocky and she said that it was her son's 13th birthday. Wasn't a minute ago she talked about him starting school? Her infectious laughter could be heard around the end of the annex. LeLe asked me what was I dong there "I said looking for people" and she asked don't you have any friends in Office I? We shared a good laugh. Then she said you won't be making friends here with the work you do, more laughs. Someone had a voice that sounded so much like Klaus I kept thinking he was there. OK for a first day.

Seems that they already want to move me to another spot, can only hope its a better one for the inconvenience.

Rain, rain go away, wanted to go to see the Phillies, I mean Pat Burrell my fave. Actually I was hoping to see Ken Griffey Jr. hit his 600th homer. Oh, well, guess 5000 othe people had the same idea, sold out and Griffey's not scheduled to play if there is no rain delay.

Love the sound of birds in the Morning...

Spring, my favorite time of year is rapidly turning to summer. The flowering trees of pear, plum and cherry have given way to iris, roses and dasies. The beauty of the trees that bloom is fleeting but worth every bit of the work. The garden has never looked better and I thought how I used to have BBQ's for Memorial Day. The weather this past weekend would have been perfect for just such an event.

Been so busy trying to put things in order that I haven't made time to sit and read emails, balance my checkbook or finish any of the novels that I've started. Did go to see Indiana Jones...and it was good. Looking forward to seeing the girls in "Sex in the City." especially if it rains this weekend.

I am planning to sell the house, despite the market slump, it will be OK as I am not trying to get rich. Just a fair market value and expenses will do. Hope it can get finished before the summer heatwave, frankly asap. This house is too much work for me. Hate to admit it. thanks to those who have pitched in now and then to help me.

Have to plan a 75th birthday for Mom as my sister lives out of town and my bro, well never mind. Any suggestions would be welcomed.

Seems life is moving at warp speed and I am in the slow lane. Freudian Slips author is in a movie soon to be release. Big Daddy is in LA, Merci is enjoying her new home. Granny moving to Fla. as is another couple I know who should have arrived yesterday. Not complaining the peace and quiet is good for my soul. Listening to the birds sing and enjoying this fresh coffee is a great way to start my day.

Keep a positive thought and as always live, love and laugh as much as possible.

What's Up?

It has been hard for me to write lately, talking not so much. Winter always leaves me feeling a little SAD and excercise does help. Chocolates seen more comforting and I am going to pay a price for that later today.

There have been many challenges and a few that I put in play myself. But on a voyage of self discovery you will hit a few icebergs along the way. There is nothing like the trip to authenticity however and you may learn that some acquaintances do not want a ticket. Some will wave from the shore. The greatest gift of any trip is to find that there are one or two who will be by your side when the water is rough and the ship is unsteady. With a good captain at the helm there will be sunshine after the rain clouds have passed. I feel blessed that there are a few shipmates out there and one or two who try to keep me on an even keel. I will not let my ship get turned around as I have gone past the point of no return and there is sunlight on the horizon.

Spring is my favorite time of year. I have gardening projects that I'd like to do if it is not too chilly this morning. Later its off to the doctor for a check up. Never mind if I go play in the dirt there will be no visit to Dr. Pat.

SAG or No Sag

Well I've been trying to tell you about the spanish actor who would be respected in America one day, ever since I first saw "The Dancer Upstairs" in 2003. Conversations with Pax lead me to one of his finest performances to date in "Before night Falls." Since "The Sea Inside," I have not missed one of his films since, some are better that others, even I must admit. Naysayers be warned Javier Bardem is not just another pretty face. I waited anxiously for "Love in the time of Cholera," thinking it would be a blockbuster as the book was excellent. Maybe reading the book first is not such a good idea. But two movies released in one month, coincidence, I doubt it.

A few weeks ago the Screen Actors Guild named him as the best supporting actor for his role in "No country for old men." The entire cast was outstanding! It's worth the price of admission for the big screen effects, as I said in a previous blog. The SAG awards also found cause to credit Ms. Julie Christie for her performance in "Away from Her." Despite being in her sixties she looked beautiful and gracefull in her acceptance. There is a line about grace in this film that haunts my thoughts still. She says "what this situation needs is a little grace."

I am sure all the films nominated are good but these two were my faves....so far. There is much work to do before Zelda can print her list of Oscar contenders......

Faux Spring

Was today a beautiful day here in So. Joisey? There was sunshine warm temperatures and I just felt like wow, spring really is coming. First I noticed that it is no longer dark when I leave work anymore. 2. There was no need to wear a heavy coat. Ok, I'm still a bear to wake up in the morning, urgghh. Guess the season of hibernation and winter are not quite gone. But I'm happy while it lasts......

Come on Springtime

There are fifty days till spring, give or take. right now I am happy every time the sun shines. How sad, i've had enough winter already. Finding it too cold to walk outdoors unless it is a necessity. How sad again? Forget about the cost of heating oil, I am considering a second job just for that. Where are my gardening catalogs? Seeing primroses and spring floweres forced into bloom in the Acme yesterday was uplifting. The flower show cannot be far off now.....can't wait, it's a burst of spring in the cold of a neverending winter season. I need winter to be over.....asap.
How do you ward off the ills of winter? Going to sunny florida seems out of the equation this year. Any suggestions?

I just visited the DMB site and they are promoting Willi Nelsosn's cover of "gravedigger." Check out clicks1.musictoday.com or DMB web site if you want tsee his version done in black and white. Very interesting since I've never been a fan of WN before.......humm. See what you think?

You only have two feet.

While many of us are trying to carry out our newly made resolutions in this new year amidst ever rising challenges. I am going to make only one resolution and that is to do the best I can with what I have and be grateful.

Trying harder just seems to add to stress and there comes a point where enough is enough!
How much stuff do we need to collect? Is there a prize for collecting more stuff.
How big does our home have to be? Remember George Carlin said, we buy bigger homes to store more stuff.
How many shoes do I really need? My dad would laugh as he used to say "you only have two feet." How many books line my shelves that I have not read? CD's that I no longer listen to?
Are we going without any of our basic needs to servive? Food, clothing and shelter?

OK, so a few bills linger from the holidays, and basic services such as oil heat, electric and city sewage cost twice what it did a few years ago. I won't be going to the movies this week and there will be no new clothes this winter, boo hoo. We are blessed with many good things in our lives and that is something to be thankful for; such as: friends, family, and stablity that we are there for one another. Many places in the world cannot say that. Many are suffering from fires, floods, natural and unnatural disasters.

I ask myself what can I do to contribute to a better environment? to become a better friend and a more authentic person?
Seems that making resolutions are harder to avoid that we think, but as long as you enjoy and be grateful that might be the most important way to be happy. What if any changes are you planning for 2008? I am focusing on just having a happy year.

Movie Review

Those of you who know me know that I like movies. I have been told that I am not easy to please. There recently have been two, yes two movies from my fave, Javier Bardem! Having seen them both I would endorse "No Country for Old Men." It's a manly kind of film, plenty of action and suspense, violence and intensely good acting from the entire cast. Tommy Lee Jones shines in his performance.

I though that two films would make Javier a house hold name on America. I was a little disappointed with Love in The Time of Cholera. I was never convinced I was watching the character he portrayed. The female lead was above average in her performance. The difficulty lies in the fact that the novel as written by an award winning author and it is hard to make a film as good as the book.

If your looking for a good film this is the one, "Frendo!"

A better place to be

A friend asked me to write and I haven't been feeling much like it lately. Seems that I was having too many stresses for too long. My father always said "if you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything."

When Thanksgiving arrived I had to ask myself not only what am I thankful for but what have I done with my time this year?

As a kid every Thanksgiving, we traveled to grandma's in Ohio for dinner and she was a great cook. Sometimes Grandpa let me have a shrimp cocktail as a special treat. Gran's homemade noodles and baked breads rivaled anything you can enjoy in Amish Lancaster Co. restaurants. My Mom never was a good cook, except for baking a flaky apple pie. Go figure? I cooked for many years having the family at my home and now everyone seems to go there separate ways and that's OK. I am nostalgic for Gran's cooking. It was she who taught me to cook, can and bake. Many thanks.

I am thankful for a few wonderful friends & family who have been supportive in many different ways during some trying times. Some have relocated & retired, but they are still in my heart.

Grateful that my shoulder is repaired and PT is over, the co pays were breaking my budget after three months. I am healthy and able to move about, and sleep without pain. Sleep deprivation causes more stress and more emotional upsets than any one ever should have to endure. I have not had that much time off work in twenty years. Despite the shoulder pain, it was serene and welcome. OK must give big thank to the orthopaedist and physical therapist. Dave was the best, do not undergo PT with anyone else......

My birthday gift was a trip to see Josh Groban. He was excellent and I love going to concerts.
My sister and I took the time to go to the Flower Show as we have done so many times and it almost always falls on my birthday. Turning 50 was uneventful, I didn't tell you as I did not want a lot of attention (embarrassment). Whether or not that was good, I am not so sure. During the summer I snagged some great seats to "Five For Fighting". On a warm summer evening enjoyed the folk songs of Jeffrey Gaines. This has become a summer tradition for me.

I truly became a fan of baseball this year, Ryan Howard, JRolle and Pat Burrell had a lot to do with it. I am a big fan of Patsy. Who knew?

I try to spend as much time as I can with my mother as she seems to be needing more help with things. Her memory is not what it used to be. I spent years fighting with her but in the end I realize that she did the best she could. Her life as a child must have been a horrific and devastating time. Imagine hiding from the bombs during WW2 in underground bunkers with classmates that were her only family. Some of her friends could not or did not endure although many came to America, few can be found now. She had had the same best friend her whole life, how many of us can say that?

Why do I say all this, because I needed a shift to my thinking and with Thanksgiving and Christmas I finally began thinking less about myself and more about what I can do for others. As the year winds down there there is much for me, for all of us to do, if we want to make our world a better place to be.

A better place to be reminds me of Harry Chapin who dedicated himself to feeding the hungry and the charity in his name still continues all these many years after his passing.

New Beginnings- New Opportunities

....I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
Howard Koch

Yes, its the closing line of the film Casablanca. If you haven't seen it then you don't like good movies. "Grannies Ramblings" started listing great quotes in her blog and I opened Bartlett's and this is where my random search landed.

Friendship often defined by mutally beneficial relationships with other people. Some folks have many friends and aquaintances and there are those who prefer a select few. Which are you? Let me ask another question do we value the relationship we have with ourselves ? They say if you don't love yourself, how can you care for anyone else. Have you performed any random acts of kindness today? this week? Have you called your pals for breakfast or lunch dates?

With a new month beginning and it being Breast Cancer Awareness month I cannot let an opportunity go by to remind all women to schedule their annual exam if they have not already done so. More on this topic later.

I am setting a challenge for myself and hopefully to inspire you to perform some random acts of kindness once each week. There is probably someone sitting next to you now who could benefit from your attention, your good listening skills or your assistance. What's it going to be?

Don't worry be happy!

It's good to be just plain happy; it's a little better to know that you're happy; but to understand that you're happy and to know why and how....and still be happy, be happy in the being and the knowing, well that is beyond happiness, that is bliss.
Henry Miller

Negative thinking seems to open the door for hell to enter and frankly I've had enough for one lifetime. Trying to embrace that which is positive, cliche though it may be, "developing an attitude of gratitude." To be thankfull for what blessings that exisit in life and be happy with what you have on the way to where you are going. Being around people who are filled with pain and negativity can ruin a persons serenity. It has taken a long time to find the peacefull center and I am not going to let myself be short circuited and fall into someone elses quagmire. In 2003 I chanted that life was too short not to enjoy yourself. Maybe I have to accept that the best I can do is not always going to be perfect. Hard lessons. So on the road toward authenticity can I do anything else but challenge myself to change the things I can and enjoy the ride now and then. So I'll continue to say the serenity prayer even if I have to repeat it ten times a day. Keep the peace, follow your bliss, dance, sing, create your art and just BE HAPPY!

Ah, the peace and quiet

The first two weeks after having surgery to repair a small tear to the rotator cuff, a slap lesion (torn tendon over shoulder) and a torn bicep muscle, was a blurr. Plenty of afternoon naps especially after the rigorous physical therapy workouts. Five weeks means that I am half way through this recovery according to the orthpedist that has been treating me. Thanks to all who helped me get through it. What have I learned after five weeks of time away form Officeland? That I can entertain myself with my hobbies, reading and dreaming of new opportunities. I did not miss working, only some friends that I've made at Officeland I and II. I read only two books one fiction and one non-fiction. As is usual I started several others..... Nothing profound in all of this but it has been filled with very little stress and a great deal of serenity.
"The fruit of the spirit is love, joy and peace........."

Bye Bye

The Garden is going on hiatus for a while. I hope to read about your continuing adventures....take care and keep the peace.

A walk back in time

Going to the boardwalk is as close as it gets to being on the ocean these days. There are few places as serene as walking on the boardwalk, taking a bench seat to gaze at the ocean and the skyline. As the sun was setting for the day looking you could see the most wonderful shades of pink and gold on the horizon as the daylight began too fade from view. There were still a few families catchiing the waves during the high tide. There was one little guy with his dad learning to use his boogie board. Surfers were looking for the best waves. Walking in the surf you cool feel the power of nature as the tide was pulling the sand away from beneath your feet. Walking in the surf reminds me of being a kid and as I gazed at the boats offshore I could not help but remember my childhood experiences of going boating and fishing in these same waters with my dad. Riding the waves from the flying bridge was as exillerating as the child first boogie board ride. Go faster Dad, faster....
Riding on the bow, (like the scene in Titanic) you can imagine that you are the only person in the world when all your view is the ocean. That was a time when everything is in front of you, no fears, no worries, just joy! If my fathers spirit visits he would surely be out on the water. His favorite place to be. For a moment last night it was mine too.

FYI

They say a picture is worth a thousand words....This is Javier Bardem for those of you who don't know the name. If you are a fan of the movies, treat yourself to The Sea Inside, The Dancer Upstairs or Before Night Falls.

What a weekend

Friday the day I'd been waiting for finally arrives and its off to the Ritzy theater straight from work. There reason I cannot wait to see the next movie by the (unknown to most Americans)great Spanish actor, Javier Bardem. He has three movies roles coming out this year.

About this film, without giving too much away.....powerful, disturbing and though provoking. Just the way I like 'em. Maybe too disturbing, he was so villanous...so political and power hungry. Sounds contemporary huh, well its about the Spanish Inquishion and the French Revolution exemplified through the lives of three individuals. Seems that Milos Formeman has wanted to make this film for many years and worked many to create this one. Of course, I caanot be truly objective when I say Javier dominated the film. This was a dark time in history and it appears that at least one message is that history has taught us very little. Has anyone else seen this film?

Going to Pax's birthday was so much fun, laughing so hard the tears kept flowing from my eyes. Enjoyed seeing Gracie, Lu, and meeting Mrs. FS again. Never saw Klaus quite like that before. I Think everyone had a good time.

Sunday I felt like I was in a fog, not from drinking as much as staying up late. Guess I'm not getting any younger. A nice long walk cured what was wrong with me. What a nice weekend it was.